Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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