At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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