We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I just threw up on my dentist
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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