id be glad to
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
