Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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