Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
