You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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