We need to rekindle our bromance
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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