I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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