I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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