Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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