ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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