it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
