HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
