Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
