Im at strip club and am horny
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
