Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
