I wannas sexs uuuuu
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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