Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
