Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
