38 yer olds are good kisserssss
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
