Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
