I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
