she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
