Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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