its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
