bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
