She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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