I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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