Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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