that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
