Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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