my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
