Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
