If i come over, it means nothing
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
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My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
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Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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