i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
