I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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