He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
