erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
