Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Randomize
