East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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