Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
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I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize