Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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