Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
