I could have mohawked her pubes.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
