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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?

  (1-337): View more from Louisiana

  4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  mom cant say that college never taught us math

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?

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• (562): View more from California

  she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down

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• (209): View more from California

  She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.

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