i would punch a child for taco bell
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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