Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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