They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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