in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT