Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.