Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Walk of Shame today included voting.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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