tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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