Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
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we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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